A lola abused by her caregiver

It is so heartbreaking to see the video I first saw at Eden’s blog about a caregiver abusing a Filipino lola. I just can’t imagine sending our own mother to a home where she would be cared for by strangers and we won’t know how she would truly be treated.

It is my impression that some people are so busy that they don’t have time to take care of their elderly on their own. Or it could be more economical to send them in a nursing home.
I’ve visited a nursing home in Korea that is being run by Catholic nuns. That was years ago but I was impressed at how “high-tech” the place was. I pitied the grandmothers and grandfathers I saw who were confined to their beds because they’re too old to move. I was really surprised to learn that such a facility exists in this country where it is considered a duty for the children to take care of their parents when they’re old. In a Korean family, this responsibility traditionally falls on the hands of the first son. However, with my Korean family it seems that my PILs would prefer to stay with us even if my husband is only the third son.


  1. =( in this article, I suddenly remember Park Yong Ha,, because of something that you know what I mean…. I read some article that a foreign wive will surely gonna have a hard time especially when their Korean husband is first son or unico ijo, most of the time pa daw they are against, for their son to marry foreigner..and about the video,this is disheartening.

  2. Yes, that is true, here in korea, traditionally daw,the oldest myonuri (daughter in law) has to take care of the oldies, kawawa ang mga foreign wife, na mag-aalaga na parang katulong sa mga byanan, (free caregiving, at the same time, free housemaid pa kapag minalas malas, then di halos makaktikim ng respeto sa pamilya nilang korean, no wonder di nakakapag-asawa ang mga karamihan na korean ng kapwa nila. and, take note, parang normal ang sitwasyon na nasa you tube, dahil kahit sa mga korean, may ganyang sitwasyon, normal iyan, kapag di nila gusto ang pasyente kahit kapwa nila, ganyan ang trato, unless kung may pera ang kamag-anak ng pasyente at magbibigay ng hiwalay na bayad or tip kumbaga sa caregiver, I knew it coz nagtrabaho ako sa ospistal ng mga matatanda rito, isa pa, nakita ko rin ang pasyente sa daycare ng matatanda na kapag nagalit sila sa matandang inaalagaan nila, pwede nila itong gutumin, ang resulta, di nila gusto ang foreigner na caregiver lalo na kapag ito ay Filipino, dahil hindi kaya ang ganyang trabaho o pagmamaltrato.

  3. I have a lola who is turning 87 this november, and up to now malakas pa din sya. I felt sick watching this video. Hindi ko ma take yung ginagawa sa lola.

  4. I don’t understand why some people are sending their old, helpless parents to nursing home? Why can’t they just let them stay in their home and have someone to look after their parents’ needs. You know, 20 to 40 years ago, these old people are taking care of their 5 to 6 children, gave them food, drove them to school, some were working 2 jobs just to give the demands to their children. But now that these children are professionals, they just dumped their parents in the nursing home and you won’t believe it, they won’t visit them regularly, not on their birthdays, not on Christmas! It is so common her in the U.S.

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